We all have emotional triggers.
I know I sure do!
How we respond or react to the trigger will determine the quality in which we live our lives.
Triggers are new experiences that remind us of past, painful experiences.
More often than not, the new experience has absolutely nothing to do with the past experience and everything to with us not being healed from what has happened to us.
When the trigger arises, it hits up against the emotionally traumatic energy that is still within your body. Many of us push it wayyyyyy down in hopes that we won't feel it or no one else sees it. The problem is that it isn't hidden and it is sitting there with an exposed button to be pushed.
Triggers believe it or not are beneficial and can work in your favor if you work them.
What I mean by this is that triggers, when received properly (not projected outwardly, putting the finger at what they did) but rather as your cue to look inward, you'll begin to at the very lease become aware of your triggers. Your awareness, when willing, can take you on an inward journey of what's coming up for healing.
Here are some examples of emotional triggers. Are any of them close to home?
Someone attempting to control you.
Someone rejecting you.
Someone judging you.
Someone ignoring you.
Someone being unavailable to you.
Someone giving you a disapproving look.
Someone who is too needy.
I remember being in a relationship with someone and a trigger for me was when we started becoming unavailable. It immediately reminded me of other times someone was unavailable for me (personally or professionally.) It made me feel afraid because unavailability to me at that time equaled rejection and abandoned which meant something was wrong with me. That negative core belief was formed as a 7 year girl who made up in her mind that wasn't good enough. From 7 until I said no more, I was reacting and living out the my 7 year old's experience time after time.
That's what happens when we react to triggers. We are reliving the trauma of our little girls.
Change can be a challenge, however it first begins with awareness and your willingness to do a new thing.
Get a clean cheat of paper and draw a line down the middle. On one side label it Triggers and write out all of the triggers that you can think of. It may not be all of them, but just think of as many as you can. On the other side of the line, label it Responses and list all the ways you respond to triggers.
Some response examples are:
I get angry.
I get needy.
I become a people-pleaser.
I shutdown, withdraw, and give the silent treatment.
I blame someone else for my pain.
I try to push down the pain through – food, drugs, alcohol, sex, shopping, work, etc
Now you have a snapshot of triggers and responses. Knowing yourself places you on the path course corrective action. You don't have to move through life triggered and being controlled by your emotions. You can give yourself some self love, self compassion, and self appreciation through the process.
In the course BELIEVE BETTER! I provide the tools and teach you
* How to identify limiting beliefs that have gone unchecked and unchallenged;
* How to become aware of your triggers and;
* How to re-frame these beliefs and began the process of living life authentically!
Get the entire life course, plus bonus inner work assignment and self awareness assessment worksheets as a one time offer, or you can join us in the HEAL YOUR LIFE TRIBE and get it for FREE!
Are you willing to take the next steps in order to experience emotional freedom. You don't have to live life with your emotions controlling you. You are in control!
Remember that healing is in our hands.
Sincerely, Schan
Your BEING WOMAN Life Coach
For a deeper, one on one soul healing session with me, let's connect at www.calendly.com/coachingwithschan
